I have 3 kids and always thought it would be 4; however, after my daughter was born I felt like our family was complete. We had 2 boys and now our little girl. My husband and I both agreed that we felt 3 was the perfect number for our family. I felt that I could still give each child their own time and make them feel special.
My youngest child just turned 5 and graduated preschool this week. It really had me thinking. Am I REALLY done? I loved breastfeeding. It came natural to me and my babies. I loved that baby smell. I loved watching them turn from babies into toddlers. I loved watching them turn from toddlers to independent children with their own personalities. I love watching them discover new things. And I know I would love watching my other kids with a new baby loving baby so much and spoiling him rotten.
After my daughter was born I got an IUD. Well… The five years is up and I’m really struggling with my options. I’ve talked to the doctor about it too. Should I get another IUD? Should I get my tubes tied? I also know too many women that don’t have a decision to make. Unfortunately, their decision was made for them because of infertility or other causes. Since I turn 40 this year, I feel that it’s now or never. Even though I thought we decided that we were done having babies a few years ago, today I’m having a very difficult time ACCEPTING it.
It is easier to accept it when I am around my youngest friends’ families. More often that I care to admit, I am the oldest mom in the group. Most of them are just starting their families and it’s easy for me to forget that I’m over 10 years older than a lot of them. And even though I feel a desire to have another baby, I ask myself: Do I really want to have another baby at 40? 2 or 3 years ago, sure; now, no, I don’t think so. I made the right decision for our family.
I know so many women that just knew, after a certain child was born, their families were complete. Their decision seemed so easy for them. Before their last child was even born, they were very confident in their decision on their family size. And I rarely talk to another mom that isn’t sure about having more kids, many just say yes or no, with perfect clarity.
I’m still, slowly and somewhat reluctantly, accepting that my family is complete and that door to my life is closing. Do you feel the same way? Did you know right away when your family was complete or did it take you awhile to accept it?
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